Archive for Life

Plans and changes

Heya!

So, as it turned out, I didn’t write anything more over the weekend – reason being, I had headaches, plus for some reason, I was incredibly horny. I honestly don’t know why, but it seems like every time I recovers from illness – or periods, to be honest! *lol* – I ends up being horny all the time. Suffice to say, my toys saw a fair bit of use…! *hee*

But I’m not gonna talk too much about that (sorry, if you were hoping I would…!), and instead Imma gonna write about something else.

I currently have five weeks left of my contract at work (and it’s not gonna get extended any further – we agreed that I would leave on the 14th December so I can have a nice relaxing long Christmas period) and what I want to do is to get myself in a much better habit of living before that day comes. So, my first bit of business was to get myself some containers for cooking – more specifically, microwave cooking. See, when I finish work and come back from work, it’s normally around 6pm or later, depending on whether I’ve been shopping or not, and the last thing I want to do is stand around the cooker stirring things and everything else. I’d much rather just put something in and let it cook. But I didn’t have anything that I could do that with, not really. So I was stuck with just ready meals, takeaways or cold food. Which… got boring. Really boring. And probably wasn’t really the best diet I could have, either, certainly there were days when I’ve felt bloated (being honest…), which probably contributed to the fact that I got pretty ill (outside of the fact that we all get colds and the like, I certainly didn’t help myself by my poor diet…).

So… I’ve bought a couple of things. I bought a vegetable steamer set, and a rice cooker, both of them microwaves, and what I’ve been doing lately (when I haven’t been suffering from headaches…!) is putting meat in the oven – chicken or whatever – and microwaving the vegs and honestly it’s working better for me, I can just relax, go and do something else until it’s time to plate up. So that’s the first step.

The second step is to – especially since I was ill (yes, it was only a cold, but it was bad in some ways) – get back into the habit of giving myself set aims every day, which could be something as simple as write 1,000 words or whatever, and try to meet those aims. If I can do that then hopefully by the time I finish work in mid-December, I can start writing more and making a lot more headway on things than I have been. *nods*

Talking about work, as it were, like I say I’ll be finishing on the 14th December, and I’ve been offered (and verbally accepted) a permanent position at the company, same position, with the start date in mid-January. I’ve not been given a contract to sign yet, but I imagine that will come probably in December. Still four days a week as well, because I found it working better for me – and, to be quite honest, even working 30 hours a week, I still find myself without much, if anything, to do for periods of time every week. (That’s not me being immodest either – quite honestly, I’ve found I could do everything that I’ve been given in around twenty hours most weeks, so I’m pretty much wasting 10 hours a week twiddling my thumbs… *sighs*) But hey… Until I becomes a full-time writer or something, I’m gonna have to work to earn enough to live on…!

Okay… Gonna stop here for now, but I’ll be writing again soon!

Cold – Bleh!

Heya!

Blehhhh… That was such a horrible cold I had. I finally feel much better than I have done for like the past couple weeks. Still got a terrible cough, and it’ll take ages for that to get back to normal, but… At least I’m finally recovering from it all.

The worst bit, though, was the eyes. This time round, for whatever reason, I had shaky eyes – like, my vision was wobbling from side-to-side. Not all the time, it happened like… 4 times, I think? And it was only for a few seconds. Feels like ages, but in reality it was probably no more than half a minute, if that.

Lemme tell you, the first time it happened, it was terrible, especially for a deaf person. People like me, we rely so much on our eyes that we really don’t want anything to go wrong with them at all. The last time, though, was… dangerous. I was driving back from work on Monday when it happened. And I was on the dual carriageway, and there was nowhere to pull to one side to stop and let the eyes recovers. *cries* The saving grace was, the road was pretty straight, and I was in a gap between cars. Even so, I still slowed down considerably and just tried to concentrate on keeping the car straight until the vision went back to normal. Thankfully… It got normal before too long and before the road started to bend or anything like that.

Just really hope nothing like this will happens again. I’d definitely prefer having to go through a few boxes of tissues rather than have shaky eyes ever again.

All I could really do was try and sleep. Wasn’t easy, either, and I just felt ridiculously tired all the time. *shakes head* Oh well… And being a contractor at work, as well, I couldn’t really take any time off to get better. The boss was at least sympathetic, so when I didn’t have any work on Tuesday, he allowed me to take the afternoon off, which definitely helped. Couldn’t do the same on any of the other days, though…

Anyway… Starting to get better, so this weekend… Mmm. I almost want to throw myself back into doing everything, but I know I shouldn’t. For starters, my cough is still bad so the best thing is almost to take it slow this weekend and try and get better for the rest of the year. So I guess what I’m gonna be doing is to try and slowly get myself back into the swing of things and get everything in the place cleaned up. Without trying to do everything at once. Plus, I know I’ve probably got a lot to catch up on, so I’ll do that over the weekend as well!

Yeah, it’s gonna be a quiet weekend, but honestly after the week, I probably need to take it quiet, and get back to normal – or as normal as it gets for me! – sooner rather than later.

Okay, all going well, will write again tomorrow – I kind of want to write every day this weekend, just to catch up on things and all! 😀

See you soon!

Arm strain, honestly!

Heya! Been a while, right? Good reason for that… I’ve got a bad arm – saw the doctor last Friday, and the good news is, it’s just a muscle strain. The bad news is, it’s a muscle strain. While it’s my right arm, being left-handed, it doesn’t stop me from writing. What does is the fact that – unless I’m resting it on something – any movement, even just sitting at a desk or something, means my arm’s gonna ache, and sometimes pretty badly. Like, sucking-your-breath bad. So… You can probably imagine just how painful it is every evening after work. And I still gotta drive back from work. Not fun.

It’s the triceps, apparently. And I’ve been getting pain from the elbow all the way to the shoulder. Yeah. That bad. Anyway… Because it’s a muscle strain, the only thing I can do is take painkillers and see a physiotherapist and do some exercises in order to strengthen it again. But knowing how long it took my knee to recover (and I still occasionally get clicks and twinges), well… Yeah. We’re looking at a couple months here, at least. Fun(!)

Oh, and I had my flu jab in that same right arm. *rolls eyes* Yes, I know, it’s always best to have the flu jab, but it doesn’t help, and I still feel like there’s a minor pain where the needle went in. And I dun feel all that good either right now – whether that’s because of the flu jab or the minor cold that seemingly went away last week – I don’t know. But yeah. Never rains but pour, right?

Anyway, obviously I miss writing, blogging and everything else – I still tweet, but that’s because with 140 characters, I can just tweet and put the phone or tablet down without my arm begging for mercy…! So, what I’ve done today is I took a bit of a rest with the arm (honestly, have you tried reading a book or whatever with one arm?? Not easy, lemme tell you!) and as soon as it started feeling less painful, I started writing this. Still gonna be short, but if I can do this, then hopefully I’ll start feeling better about everything again.

Especially since it’s now GMT time zone here, meaning the evenings are getting dark an hour earlier. Which means that when I finishes work, it’s already night-time out. :/ I do not like coming out of work when it’s dark, and I definitely don’t like driving at night!

But nothing I can do about it right now, just gotta get on with it as best as I can, and make sure I use my lightboxes when I get back from work.

(And before anyone asks about what’s different about leaving work this year, compared to last year, I was in “permanent” employment, working in SQL development, and my hours were 8-4:30, which was better for me, and meant I had more daylight in the evenings… Now, I’m just a contractor, so I can’t really go round changing my hours or anything. Especially since my contract finishes mid-December. The saving grace is, at least I only have to work 4 days a week, instead of 5…)

Maybe next year will be different, because I’ve been offered the chance to turn the contract into a permanent position, starting mid-January, but still considering it. Probably will take it up since I’m getting nowhere finding another development job (deafness, I tell you…), and this way – if I can shake off this arm strain – I can devote more time to getting myself towards where I really want to be. That’s still the aim, and it has to always be the aim, for me. Otherwise… Well… I’ll just be stuck here, and I dun want to be stuck here in this monotone life that ain’t really properly living.

Okay… Gonna stop here for now – I did say it was gonna be short! – but since this method of resting the arm for a short while seems to work, I’ll hopefully be back writing a lot more from now on! 🙂

See you soon!

Taking things a half-day at a time

Heya! It’s Wednesday here, and I’m currently trying to enact a new schedule for me. Namely, one where – when it’s a day that I have to go to work – I do some writing in the morning (for at least an hour, hour and half) and hopefully carry on in the evenings. And that, I’m hoping, will lead to being able to focus and do more writings in my three-days weekends.

At the moment, the ones that I’m finding it easier to get on with are the game guides, doing some writing from memory (and referring to other guides) in the mornings, then playing them in the evenings following the guide and making amendments as I go along.

Obviously, game guides are not really what I want to be doing – I have no intention of doing anything further with them except for personal use – but I think it’s better to do something and get into the habit of doing something with the aim of getting better and doing things on a regular basis. Already I’ve been jotting down my ideas for Yore! down in notebooks. It’s just a question of merging them together and getting the best ideas out of them.

The ultimate aim, of course, is to be able to get to a schedule where I’m writing stories and the like on a daily basis and only doing Yore! and game guides secondary. I’m not there yet, but that’s the aim.

I can’t afford to look that far ahead, though. The important thing I need to do right now is make sure that I keep this up, turn this into a habit, and… Yeah. Like I said on Twitter, I’m at a stage where I kind of need to keep working on myself a half-day at a time, working out what I’m gonna be doing and then actually getting on with it. Hopefully, soon, I’ll be able to think about taking it a day at a time, then a week and so on.

Yesterday, I couldn’t do that. The morning was because I had to leave early (like, before 7) because I needed to get petrol for my car and it was really low because the petrol station I know about close to my new place was shut and the only other ones I knew were too far away or in an awkward position (like, dual carriageway with a short exit awkward). Thankfully… I was able to get petrol from that dual carrageway station and get out onto the road without any problems. And then yesterday evening, I had an idiot try and cut me off on the road, while I was driving back from work. Pretty sure the idiot was one of those white supremacists as well.

This is what I dun like about myself. I let these things affect me. I was annoyed and upset yesterday evening and I couldn’t focus on anything. In the end, I pretty much stayed on Twitter and watched recorded shows like “Enter the Dragon” (I only recorded that because I know people basically keep saying how great this film is and everything…).

Yeah… I still need to learn how to just shrugs it off and move on. Idiots like him are everywhere and I shouldn’t let them affect me like this. I know there are a lot of white supremacists around and I’m not stupid enough not to think that – as a black lady – I don’t get this kind of treatment on a regular basis, but… Equally, I can also say that, as a deaf person, I don’t normally hear them, plus I’ve learnt to tune them out and ignore them years ago. This is different. This is visual, this was a guy who almost caused me to get in an “accident”. So, yeah… I think it’s because it’s different from the normal.

Anyway… The fact I’m writing now means I’m starting to get over it, and I’ll be fine tonight. *nods*

Well, unless something else happens, but I hope not! *grins*

Yesterday at work was a bit tiring too. I had a rather complicated specification come in that I needed to work on. The SQL bit wasn’t a problem, it was the Excel side of things. I’ve never used pivot tables (well, I’ve refreshed them, but that’s the only I ever did in the past), and – this is something I’m kinda proud of – I self-taught myself how to put together pivot tables, learnt how to set up calculated fields, learnt how to use slicers and link pivot tables together and answered pretty much every problem I’ve had come up… And all that in the space of 3 hours. I’m sure other people would’ve done it much faster than me, but hey… I’m satisfied with how I’ve done! 🙂

But here’s hoping today’ll be better and I can do more game guides work or Yore! stuff tonight!

Okay… Gonna stop here for now. I’ll see you again soon!

I get crushes so easily… *sighs*

Heya!

Whew… That was a decent weekend. Still haven’t done much in the way of writing or being able to make progress with finding out how best for me to become a freelance writer and all, but… After getting a severe migraine on Monday and not being able to shake off the migraine until sometimes Tuesday afternoon and then the headache going by Wednesday evening… *sighs* I just kinda needed a complete escape. And I decided to try out the Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky (on the PSP) as a way to leave everything behind… And, of course, knowing me, I kinda got addicted for a while… *hee*

I think I was really disappointed when the second and the third in the Trails in the Sky series didn’t get released in the UK. Well, physical release, anyway. *shakes head* The second game in the series did get a download-only release for the PSP a couple or so years back, but my PSP won’t connect to the router I’ve got now. Guess the router (which I did get back in June…) is just too new. But thankfully, I was able to get the game to download and work on the Vita, so that’s something. I’ve only gave the second one a quick run to check that it works and all…

The third one, though… *shakes head* I didn’t see it in the Playstation Store, and from looking online, I don’t think it ever got released for Europe. In fact, it seems like some sources are saying it never got released outside of Japan? *sighs* Being a JRPG fan is not an easy thing sometimes, is it? I should double-check, though. And maybe find out if it’s possible to buy and play US physical versions on the PSP… Hmm.

Anyway… At least the rumours that I’ve seen about the third game in Trails of Cold Steel is a bit more positive – although it’ll be for the PS4 rather than the PS3. It might take a bit longer, but the chances of it being released for Europe is potentially likely. Whether that’ll be 2018 or 2019, I dunno. All the languages we have for Europe, you know…! And from what I’ve seen, the number of words there’s to translate for the third game is like… three or four full-sizes novels. So… Quite a challenge, really.

But yeah… Like I say, being a JRPG fan is a challenge sometimes. You’re really hoping that some company will pick up the rights to bring out the whole series, especially when it comes to Europe. According to my brothers, it’s a lot better than it was, back in the pre-Playstation days, but… Even so, I’m still always anxious until they get released here! And preferibly on physical media as well!

Something I’ve noticed before and remembered again, though… I do appears to get a lot of crushes of video games characters and all. *hee* I think the reason is probably because I’m single and have been for a fair while, and while I know I’m not ready to have a girlfriend, I still want one. *grins* So I guess video games characters are a way to just let my imagination runs riot!

So which character did I develop a crush on this time? Scherazard Harvey, of course! Even though I know there’s no chance I’d be able to cope with her, especially given the way she’d umm… *coughs* get when she’s drunk. (No, you don’t actually see her get drunk, but from what Estelle and Joshua have said… Yeah. *grins*)

Oh well. It’s not every video game characters, just that I do tend to get crushes on a few! There does appears to be a certain type. Basically, it appears to be those that are pretty much the opposite of me. While I can be a bit outspoken online, I’m actually quiet and shy when it comes to dealing with other people face-to-face. Whereas those that I tends to get crushes on are those that would have no problem in getting in other people’s faces. Scherazard, Medusa, all those. Guess it’s also a little bit of “wish I could do that” as well.

But, hey, we’re all different. I like to think I’m decent when it comes to the written word, right? *grins*

Okay… Gonna stop here for now. Hopefully, I’ll be able to write again in the next couple of days! Until next time, see you soon!

It’s Friday! Yay!

Heya! Whew… I’m so, so glad it’s Friday. The whole week has been so tiring and so boring and so… stressful at the same time. *sighs* I do sometimes wonder whether I should just extend the contract to work at that place until the end of the year (as I provisionally agreed with), or just get out at the end of the month.

The problem is, at the moment, I need to work and earn money, so… It’s not like I have much of a choice. I haven’t had any luck finding anything else that I can do, and when I do find something (IT-related), I’m not getting anywhere with anyone. And when people do contact me, it’s always “give us a call, go on”, or it’s related to jobs that are jobs that I know I wouldn’t be able to do so what’s the point of even e-mailing me in the first place? A quick glance at the CV that you’ve apparently looked at would’ve told you that!! *smh* *growls* Whatever… At least, with this contract, I have Fridays off so I can work on what I actually want to do, writing.

I’m still trying to work out the right way forward, and I haven’t got a clue, quite honestly. I feel like I need to find someone, sit down with them, and talk about how I can get moving forward with everything, being paid to be a freelance writer for someone. Even if it means just writing up technical documents or whatever, I’d be far happier doing that than sitting in a office surrounded by people for like 8 hours a day every day, trying to find enough to keep me busy throughout the whole day…

Anyway… Let’s put all that to one side. This weekend, I’m mostly planning to do work on the Yore! side of things. The fact that I’m stressing out so much right now, and with the effects of the end of summer, I haven’t been able to focus on the novels that I’ve been writing (and yes, I means novels, plural), and whenever I do sit down and start trying to write them, I’m not getting the words out right (honestly, you should see how many pages are more crossed-out than actual words that I can use…!). I kind of like need a period of time where I can just take it easy, de-stress myself, and then I’d be able to focus and get it all down on paper.

Maybe do some more game guides writings as well, but the main focus is gonna be Yore! stuff.

Okay… I’m gonna go and post this now. There’s gonna be another post soon (I’ll probably write it all out and then double-post it, actually… *grins*) which is why this is a little on the short side… *grins* And I’ll write again soon!

After that, well… I actually need to go through my twitter account and remove some people. I’m pretty sure that there’s a few that I’m following who followed me first and then removed me… *shrugs* There are quite a few people that I have no problems following and not being followed back, but others… Well, if they dun like what I write and retweet… I dun really care. But I do need to tidy up the twitter account, so… Yeah.

Shrugging off Autumnal effects

Heya!

So, it’s the end of summer, and we’re now going through Autumn. Whoopee… *grins* At the same time here, it just felt like everything went all gloomy and wet over here. Certainly nowhere near on the level of what’s been happening in the Caribbean and so on, but definitely been your average British wet and gloomy weather. And I think that double-whammy – and a few other things – kind of made me feel a little down.

And by other things, I means, I’ve been going through some stuff which has been reminding me of my past, basically, and I dun really want to remember the past, to be honest. I’m trying to adopt the mentality of “the past is the past, leave it there”, but over the past few days, it’s been rearing its ugly head and roaring “PAY ATTENTION TO ME!” right in my face. *sighs*

Basically, I’m trying to make sure that I’m looking forward to whatever’s gonna happens, with optimism and hope, and not keep looking back and thinking “I wish…” or “What if…”.

The good news is, I’m almost finished. I still have some stuff left to do, but that won’t be for another couple of weeks or so, when I’m hopefully mentally a bit better.

What I’ve been doing is trying to cheer myself up, and making things brighter here. Like, I’ve dug out my lightboxes (I took the one that I bought for myself at work back to my place when I was made redundant back in May) and I’ve set them up, and I’ve used them a couple of times. The almost-natural lights does helps a lot. As well as that, I’ve been doing things like watching DVDs of “Death in Paradise” and re-reading Medusa’s story in Astoria: Fate’s Kiss. Doing things that can pick my mood back up and everything.

I was hoping to do some writing today – outside of the blog post I’ve always intended to put together today, that is – but… *shakes head* Cooking and cleaning up took me longer than I expected, not to mention all the other things that I needed to do today… *rolls eyes*

(Yeah, I’m trying to make sure I’m eating properly again – the next step of getting back on the diet plan) Didn’t help that I burnt some of the rice… Oops… *lol* My fault, I thought I’d put in enough water, but I guess I needed to put in an extra cupful. (I thought the accepted measurement was 2 cups of water for 1 cup of rice, but I guess either my cooker’s a bit more powerful than the one at my old place, or I didn’t have the temperature at the right level, so… Next time, I’ll put in three to be on the safe side) Fortunately, I was able to shift the burnt rice and clean the pan without too many problems.

Fortunately, from what I can work out, tomorrow evening should be relatively quick so I can get sitting down and writing with a couple of hours to spare. Which is good.

That the main thing I gotta do now – make sure I give myself time to write daily. Could be anything – could be stories, could be Yore! work, could be writing game guides, could be blog posts… Just as long as I do something every single day, get myself back into that habit again, and before long… Yeah. I’m looking forward to being in the right habits for me.

Okay… Gonna stop here for now, but I’ll write again soon – maybe tomorrow, more likely Wednesday. Got a few observations to make about things that’s been happening, so I’m not short of topics.

Saying that, though… If there’s anything you want me to write about… Do let me know! I’m always receptive to ideas! 😀

See you soon! 😉

Making the most of bank holiday Monday

Heya! How goes things?

I have to admit, when I got out of work last Thursday, I totally didn’t know that today (Monday) was a bank holiday here. But then, I didn’t really think of today as being the last Monday of the summer (Bleh!). But after the weekend being, well… It wasn’t just a headache, let’s just say, it was a bad weekend. But seeing as how I didn’t have to work today, I figured the best thing to do is to pretty much just call August a write-off, and start again from September 1st – which conveniently happens to be Friday! *grins* (Although, hopefully, it will rather be almost straight away from Thursday evening after work…)

So, today, I’ve been doing a lot of work around the place – getting all the paperwork sorted out (old bills and everything and making sure I haven’t got anything outstanding that’s gonna pop up at a later date – and thankfully, I haven’t. Everything’s all caught up and paid) and making sure all the housework – laundry and cleaning up the place – is all caught up, and… Well, pretty much everything that I could think of that could be left outstanding from all the hecticness over the past few months. (And believe me, there was a fair amount)

Yeah, the plan was, just start off Friday with a clean slate and hopefully by doing that I can actually get on with realising my dreams and everything else. It’s not getting to the point where I’m gonna say “Right, this day Imma gonna write X amount of words”, but hopefully it will be at the point where I can say “Right, this day Imma gonna write X, Y and maybe Z as well”.

(Because you know me, I tends to have three or four things on the go at once. For some reason, I’m not very good when it comes to focusing on one thing at a time. I typically find myself happily writing away at one thing, and then I get ideas about a completely different thing so I have to go off and write those down before I forget!)

*looks around* It is getting there, though. The whole place is getting close to where I want it to be. There still need to be more bright colours, but it’s definitely getting there.

Oh, I might not have mentioned this… But the plug socket that got broken when the picture fell? Yeah, that’s all fixed now. Thankfully. All that’s left is to sort out the wall and think of an alternative way to hang up the picture (now that it’s in a new frame which is lighter). My dad has suggested putting some wood up in a kind of floor-to-ceiling frame set, and those wood could be brightly coloured, leaving the wall white… And I gotta admit, I like the idea. Kind of thinking it could be a bright rainbow-coloured pattern, maybe. Red at the top and going down to violet at the bottom. Maybe. Kind gotta let it ruminate in my head a little bit, see if it’ll be a good idea, or whether it might be better doing something else.

There’s something else I need to look for, for the ceiling. The ceiling I’ve got is full of those little ceiling insert lights things? Dunno what you call them, but there’s a bunch of them. And what I had in mind, I’ve got this book about Atlantis (basically talks about the possibility of Atlantis existing and where it could be), and in that book, there’s a big picture of an artist’s impression of what might be in the temple at the centre of Atlantis. Now, I’m not remotely interested in having a big gold statue of Poseidon, or an orichalcum pillar or anything like that, but I loved the ceiling that the artist’s impression had. It was basically pure white (or might be ivory-coloured) and there were these gold sun shapes (more or less flat against the ceiling, not sticking out in a sphere or half-sphere or anything like that) as well. And I had this idea – whether good or bad, I dunno – but maybe if I could get some gold sun shapes and have them around those lights it might make the ceiling look really good. I just dunno the terminology to make looking for something like that a bit easier.

Oh well, I’ll keep looking and hopefully I’ll find something some day!

Anyway… I’d better post this and get going. Hopefully the upcoming week will be a lot better for everyone! See you soon!

Various films musings

Heya… How goes things? Hopefully not too bad. Here… Not been too good. Had a really bad long-lasting headache. It’s only just now starting to fade. *smh* So, most of what I’ve been spending my days on is pretty much reading old comics.

Tonight, I’ve been… Well, I was trying to watch some films that’re on the telly. For example, currently on the telly is “Immortals”, which is… So loosely based on Greek mythology that pretty much the only thing it get slightly accurate are the names. *shakes head* And I thought Percy Jackson was pretty poor as well.

Oh, and if you’re wondering about the picture up there… It was already in the picture selection and I thought that’ll do. Otherwise, I’d’ve just looked for a stock photo of popcorn or something! *grins*

To be honest, I’m finding “Immortals” incredibly boring and too full of bloodlust. I know a couple of people, friends and all, who loves this, and I have no idea why. But hey, if they like it, good for them!

The hardest bit about “Immortals”, though, is the weird colouring scheme that they’ve used. Not really sure why they decided to go that way, but whatever. Oh, and yes, I know this is made by the same people or whatever that did the “300” film, and I’ve only seen little bits and pieces of it – and frankly, that’s more than enough. Especially if it’s basically the same film as “Immortals”, with just a slightly different storyline.

I also saw the last 40 or so minutes of Ender’s Game, which… I dunno. Maybe I need to see it all, but… Honestly, I just felt that the way it went, it just basically reeked of how stupid humankind can get. Even after so long, they just kept staying stupid. It wasn’t a bad film, but there was nothing there that I thought was… something that I’d wanted to see again.

*changes channels* I’ve had enough. It’s too boring, too gory and quite frankly, too utter rubbish. (Yes, I was gonna put in a different word here, but I try not to be too rude, if I can help it!)

Talking about films… Is it me, or has there been an re-emergence of Tom Cruise lately? I’ve never been a fan of his, but for some reason, it feels like he’s starring in about six or seven films right now, judging from the mass of adverts there’s been lately in between programs. And from what I’ve heard, none of them are very good. Which doesn’t surprise me, but why is it that people still think he’s worth taking on and making a big deal out of? It feels like people are trying to make him a big deal when he’s never been one. At least, not to me. And most likely, not to pretty much everyone else.

Honestly, the sooner he go back to doing whatever he was doing before he decided to return to making films, the better I think.

And honestly, why in the world would someone want to do another remake of the Mummy this quickly? At least give it twenty years or something like that. *shakes head* Saying that, though, they’re not the worse offenders for that. Hasn’t Spider-Man been remade about three times in the past decade? I know there’s a rumour that Sony need to do this, otherwise the rights would pretty much revert straight away to Disney (since they own Marvel nowadays…), but come on… At this rate, surely it’s just throwing money away? I can’t imagine that many people wanting to go and see yet another slightly amended version of Spider-Man any more…

(And yes, I know, as a Star Wars fan, I ought to be careful, considering that I still go all fangirly at a new film despite the fact that VII was pretty much an updated version of IV, and that Rogue One needed a much better screenwriter…!)

Saying all that, though… I haven’t watched any of the superheroes films that’s been released over the past few years. I think the last one I saw was X-Men 3? You know, the one where Jean Grey go mad and all?

It was one of the things that I had to pretty much give up when I went through my DVD collection to get rid of anything that I just didn’t want to watch again, or could ever watch (even just once – I had a dozen or so DVDs that I ended up never watching), when I was coming out of my last really bad depression phase.

My reasoning was, I just kind of got bored with the whole superhero thing, plus live films just doesn’t match animated films where superpowers and the like are concerned. And while I haven’t really been paying attention to the ratings of the latest films, I know that they’ve all been pretty much ranked as “middling at best”. And aren’t Disney trying to link all their Marvel-based films together? How many films are they trying to make and link together? At the rate it’s going… 20? 30? A bit ridiculous isn’t it?

Okay… I’m gonna stop here for now. I’ll write again soon!

Fighting off ennui…

Heya! How goes things? How’s the weekend going / been (depending on time zones, obviously!) for you? Hopefully not too bad. Here… Well, I’ve been writing. Not anywhere near as much as I wanted to, but I realised – actually, Friday, I realised this – that I was pretty much in a state of ennui, and I needed to do something to actually get rid of it, move to something where I wanna be, a mood that will see me write loads and everything. Of course, the problem was how to get rid of it!

So, the first step was the determination – basically, if I couldn’t be bothered getting on with things, then I was never gonna get anywhere fast. After that, it was basically pretty much finding a way to get on with things, (Getting back to blogging helped, by the way!) and I figured the best thing to do was to put myself on some kind of schedule. It’s not major, but knowing that I’ve given myself a few hours here or there to write was definitely a major step forward. I’ll probably have to do this for the next month or so, get myself back into that habit and everything and more or less force myself into actually getting things done instead of sliding back into ennui.

And this weekend was a good weekend in terms of doing so. Like I say, I didn’t write much – and most of it was the game guides that I write (for myself) but the important thing is that I’m actually back writing now. I dunno the word count, but it’s definitely something like 5000 or so. On a good day, I know I can do over twice that – and that just on a single day – so I’ve got some way to go. But the fact that I’m now on my way back is the important thing and I can definitely see myself sitting down and writing every day again.

The feeling of ennui… I think it was because, like I mentioned before, it felt like I was living the same day over and over again and I was getting tired and disenchanted with the way things were going. Which isn’t exactly conductive to me doing well mentally…! (So, really, while it was still summer, it was definitely high time I got back to working on myself and everything again!)

There’s a lot going on in this enforcing schedule of mine but I think it’s something that I need to do and also something that I think I can do and will do. It’s not just writing, it’s everything else as well. Personal, physical, mental, everything.

What’s else… Oh! I’ve got someone coming in on Tuesday to sort out the plug socket on the wall – the one that’s been broken when the picture fell last Sunday – and hopefully that will definitely be the very last thing that I need to get done around the place for the foreseeable future.

Okay, think that’s pretty much everything. Gonna go make sure I’ve got my schedule lined up for the next week – this is including the 4 work days that I’ve got – and then… Well, pretty much gonna go back gaming and writing more on the guides again! *grins* See you soon!